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I may look confident and put together on the outside (when I’m not in my yoga pants and a ponytail) but on the inside I often wander back to that little girl who questions her value and wants to make a difference.
There are lots of ways this inner struggle presents itself in me …
- I tether my value to how I look.
- I tether my value to how my jeans fit.
- I tether my value to how I perform.
- I want my husband and kids to love me perfectly, even though they can’t.
- I want to love others perfectly, but I don’t, so I juggle guilt like a hot potato.
- I get distracted and waste time, so I feel unproductive.
- I want to make a difference, but I try to do too much.
The Bible showcases a perfection that I implement pathetically. Like that love chapter in 1 Corinthians that most of us had read at our weddings. Verses like “love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way” (13:4–5 ESV). Wait, what? Geez! The way I love doesn’t even come close to this list! And then the big left hook smacks me hard: “Love never fails” (v. 8).
The magnitude of God’s perfect love is epic. The magnitude of my love is minuscule.
I try to be patient. I try to be kind. I try not to envy or boast. All of it. But my efforts are less than. I stub my toe on my ego all the time. I get edgy and loud. I insist on my own way. And then I beat myself up!
If I were a better mom, I would’ve ____.
If I were a better friend, I would _____.
If I were in better shape, then maybe _____.
If I were more talented, I would be able to _____.
And because I’m not content with my own body, my own behaviors, and my own abilities, I struggle to see how a perfect God can look past my brokenness. I know in my heart that He loves me, but I sometimes struggle to accept that He likes me, because sometimes I don’t even like myself.
These doubts and insecurities cause me to question my value and my ability to make a difference. They cause me to feel insignificant. Invisible and ineffective.
Yet I know that the Bible says the opposite. And because of this, I’m reminded to, instead, tether my value to truths like these:
- I was created in the image of God.
- I am sealed with the Holy Spirit.
- Jesus loved me so much that He endured a horrific death so I could be saved.
These truths matter. And because they matter, they confirm to me that I matter. And they confirm that you matter too.
Don’t think for one little minute that I don’t sense you bristling up. It’s what we girls do when the spotlight of attention is shined on our significance. We shy away. Throw our hands up to shield the light. Contest with our best excuses …
Some of us contend, “I’m really nothing special. That word valuable makes me nervous. My life is less than. Average at best. Mac and cheese is my jam. I drive a minivan, wear ponytails, use off-brand detergent, and live paycheck to paycheck. Where is the value in that?”
Others of us contend, “I cannot believe you’re going to go there! Did you not read my bumper sticker and T-shirt? I am nothing. Jesus is everything. Hide me in the cross and stop trying to make me feel special. Slap! Slap! Slap! Shame on you for even bringing up such a topic of the flesh!”
Some of us acquiesce: “Okay. Let’s talk. I know in my mind that I’m precious to Jesus, but that often gets lost in translation on its way to my heart. Yes. Let’s have this conversation. I want everything God has for me, and I’m ready to move forward as a woman of greater impact.”
Wherever you find yourself in these responses, my prayer is that you will join our last friend with an expectant and curious heart. With a heart that is ready to move forward in the truth of your significance so that you can live out the purpose for which you were created.
I am going to leave it here today. Let you marinate in thought and prayer. In part two, we will go a bit deeper and see what Jesus has to say about all this.
Lord, Help me to accept that You are the One who defines my significance. Please sift through my thoughts, doubts, insecurities, and emotions that leave me feeling like less instead of more. In Jesus’ name, amen.
FOR YOUR REFLECTION and RESPONSE
Read Jeremiah 1:4-5. When did God first know Jeremiah? Take a few moments to read over these verses again and personalize them. How does this make you feel? Click here to tell me about it on my blog.
Can’t wait to read your responses. Thanks for doing life with me.
XOXO,
GWEN
Today’s post is an excerpt from my book, I Want It ALL. This book helps narrow the gap between our average ordinary lives and the not-so-ordinary promises of God found in His Word. We are meant to be women of impact who expect great things and move in the power and grace of Jesus.
That’s the message of I Want It ALL.
Order yours today from Amazon, Barnes & Noble or ChristianBook.com.
Comments 39
This world only knows a tiny part of me/us. The fact that God knew me/us before we were even formed in the womb is mind boggling. He knows us inside and out, up and down regardless of what we believe about ourselves or what the world would try to label us. We have been chosen by God.
My first response, God knew Jeremiah & me,too before we were ever conceived. For Jeremiah He had a plan of greatness – to appoint him to be a prophet to the nations! Many of my inner struggles have been linked to the thought of “Am I doing God’s will in this seemingly ordinary life, or should I be doing more?” But I know God’s ways are not man’s ways, and what the world considers important, is folly for God. And that no matter what, He has known me better than I know myself. I don’t need to prove my worth or even my good intentions to God. I simply need to place my life in His hands, trust where He leads and be open to His Way, being joyful in serving Him even while doing dishes, cooking, running errands….
God’s timing is always sufficient and perfect. I so needed this devotional today and of all days!!!
Over the past I don’t know maybe my entire life, I have never felt that I have worth or value. I know that it’s the enemy whispering these lies to me daily saying “I’m not good enough”, “I’m not pretty enough”, “how can someone love you with all your sin”, and of course so many more whispers I deal with daily. I’m truly thankful for the ONE who loves ME, all of me scars and all. It may take a life time to see in the mirror the value of my worth through flesh eyes, but I know that in my fathers eyes I’m more precious than rubies and diamonds. I just have to start believing it within myself!! I pour love into other, but sometimes I have trouble having someone pour their love into me. That goes back to not believing of my own worth and value. Thank you again for this!! I will be reading it again and again over and over!!! Blessings…..
Loretta,
I have been where you speak of that you are. It’s an absolute tool of the enemy to discourage us any which way he can. I was in this position at a job for about 9 months. I know the Lord put me there. It was tough tough position for me; I learned a lot about Him and myself. Then I was really really struggling with staying in the position and struggling with knowing God put me there so I have to “stick it out”. Well God removed me from that position and as relieved as I was it left me confused. I kept asking “why”, or I would say “I didn’t do this right or that right or I shouldn’t have done ‘that’.” I went through a few months asking “what” Lord, “what” do you want me to see not “why”. And what I saw was just like you said, trust. Trust that He is who He is says He is … “Yes Lord I trust You!” Now I am a stay at home wife walking along my husband who just became senior pastor at a church. I also have a full time ministry working with and carrying the message to women in recovery. I still miss what I was doing in that position very much but I know the Lord knows best! I could never be my husbands help meet working there. Thank you for sharing with us all❤️ May the Lord bless you and comfort you always!
As I read through these verses my eyes are opened to the one who speaks. The LORD is Jehovah the self existent one. Each I spoken is Jehovah speaking. He says I formed you, I consecrated you, I appointed you. Each I references Him each you references Jeremiah, you, myself. He intentionally formed us intentionally knew us, and intentionally consecrated and appointed us. No mistakes of me and you, he made us for a purpose for his pleasure and his glory. Apparently I am intentional and so are you.
Thank you for this message. It’s really all about my everyday struggles but after reading it. I’ve great hope again that I can and will one day feel that am worth so much.
This passage moves me in a way that’s indescribable. To think that the GOD of the universe knew me way before I was even conceived. I’ve read this verse before but as you said in your earlier writing, we tend to forget that GOD is on our side and that HE loves us unconditionally. I know for me when it settles in my heart what GOD wants me to know, I will be a force to be reckoned with. I don’t mean this in an arrogant way, it’s just that i feel so worthless on any given day that ii believe that once I get a hold of who I am in CHRIST that I can do ALL things.
I love the devotions, please continue to share the wisdom God has given you.
Lately, I have been seeking God in how to see Him not as my Father but as my Dad. Although, I don’t beat myself up as I once did and I believe people sharing their struggles and feelings and thoughts helped me feel a connection with others although at a distance with others who share their vulnerable side. I often listen to music and the beautiful message God reveals and opportunity to hear a fellow brother and sister in the Lord worshipping God. I am not a singer but so blessed by music and perhaps because I don’t have a singing voice it helps me appreciate even more the beautiful voices I am blessed to come a crossed as well as books written by fellow brothers and sisters in the Lord often helping me identify things feelings and thoughts within myself. Thanks Gwen for sharing.
It makes me think: How can I be insignificant if God knew me before he created me? Satan hurls stuff at me daily resulting in negativity and self doubt and this is a reminder that in those times my heart and mind need to be turned towards God.
It is so true that I struggle with the “if only I” things in my life. I feel like I fail so many times. But one thing I am learning (and this lesson is emphasizing) is that God loves me. He will take my efforts and use them for his glory. I’ve been teaching SS in a small rural church for so many years that the kids I used to teach sometimes send their kids to church. Too often I have wondered if any of it made a difference in their lives. Do they even remember any of it, especially that Jesus died for them? Then last Sunday one of my current students (age 8) wrote me a long letter about how much the lessons mean to her and how they help her. That was a first, and God knew exactly what I needed. I will keep going, and not question if my work and life has value. Thanks for the lessons.
I love this verse and it is so nice to be reminded of this today.
God knew me even before I was a thought…before I was planned / conceived. He knew me and loved me even before I understood what sin was or was capable of committing such acts. I am more than special…I am more than loved 🙂
As I read your words Gwen it struck so true within me and I am amazed that we feel this way even though we have His word, His creation and Jesus before us. Thank you for encouraging us to be mindful of God and Jesus’ words and promises.
Rose xoxo
Jeremiah 1:4-5 has me rejoicing! I’m a child of God!
Praise Him!!! There are times when I doubt everything about everything. I feel like am the only one getting all the trials in life compare to my family members. Then here comes God and reassures me that together we will face the day. When in my pitty party He will reveal the beautiful blessings I receive daily just being in His presence. I might not look or feel special in my way but I will far better accept God’s way of who He says I am. Am beautiful because of Him!!!
Isaiah 1:4-5, assures me that He is rooting for me to fulfill His plan for my life! At times we feel our human plans are best but boy are we wrong!! I pray that we accept His ultimate power and wisdom and keep realizing His ways and thoughts are not our ways or thoughts 😉 (Isaiah 55:8-9)
These verses below always give me extravagant joy when I meditate on the fact that only God (No one else) can love us perfectly!!! Amen
HALLELUJAH
Isaiah 54:5-8
“5 For your Maker is your husband,
The Lord of hosts is His name;
And your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel;
He is called the God of the whole earth.
6 For the Lord has called you
Like a woman forsaken and grieved in spirit,
Like a youthful wife when you were refused,”
Says your God.
7 “For a mere moment I have forsaken you,
But with great mercies I will gather you.
8 With a little wrath I hid My face from you for a moment;
But with everlasting kindness I will have mercy on you,”
Says the Lord, your Redeemer.”
Honestly, I’ve been practicing this for years and so many times have thought that I had made it through the desert. I finally felt like Joshua who had been rewarded later in life for the faithfulness and obedience to God through his trials. However, it seems when I feel truly blessed and receive my hearts deepest desires, it is taken from me a while later. I understand all of the buzz words and catch phrases of being grateful for what I have, as I myself have used them for others for years in my occupation and leading support groups. I try my best to continue to believe in them, however, I am at a point where I am struggling to believe that it will come to pass…or if it does that it won’t again be taken from me. Not being a “Debbie Downer” and not unhappy or depressed. Just really not feeling that his promises are for me and wondering why…again, I know what the word says and have taught it so I understand there are no real explanations until I met God face to face.
Thank you for this today! Have a lot of changes in my life in the last year and reminds me that God has a plan and all I need to do is keep the faith that he is in control!!
I thank God for your writing today. I have been feeling exactly, every inch every part that your blog described. Satan’s attack on me are a lot harder because God is taking me to wonderful places and growing in Him and trying to heal so thank you again for your words I look forward to the second part .
Today, God gave me the gift of another birthday…the BIG 50:-0!!! Reflecting back over all the trials and triumphs in my life, I see where His sweet grace has allowed me to grow in my faith, to make me stronger not weaker, to glorify Him and not myself, and to kick doubt in the face by falling on my face before Him. I still struggle with doubt/my worth/my true purpose/anxiety/depression, but God’s light outshines all that darkness and brings my strengths to light! He allowed me to go through some pretty rough seasons because HE KNEW I would not be afraid or ashamed to share them for His glory, where He delivered me from the pit twice, and where miracles were abound even though I was a mess. I am grateful to Him and beyond blessed! From broken to beautiful(twice) is this girl’s story and it’s the story He gave me. As doubt was part of my day yesterday, as well as beating myself up about this or that, today I’m claiming Jer.1:4-5. I don’t have to be perfect because He is! Yesterday was full of, “I don’t have what it takes to be a Christian motivational speaker/blogger/mentor/possible new ministry leader/the best mom, wife, friend, sister, daughter, etc….” and on and on I went drowning in my devaluing pity part self. My pity party could have been bc it was the last day of being in my 40’s too:) Today, because of your most timely and genuine devotional, Gwen, I’m enveloped in the reassurance of His love and purpose for me. I may not know the next step, my clear purpose, be consumed with doubt/fear, or question what His plans hold for me; but I know He’s up to something and I will strive to love, obey and serve Him! Focusing on the family, friends, gifts and spiritual gifts He blessed me with, not drowning myself in the mess from the past. Jeremiah 29:11…Thank you Gwen xoxoxo!
You’ve said what I’m feeling at 50. The daily doubt. Not because I know God won’t/wouldn’t ( because I know different) just the trial I guess I hate facing, but through and through he’s showed me different. I guess what I’m
Saying is I’ll have to be obedient to listen, believe and wait things out knowing he’s working things for my good.
Jeremiah 1:4-5 Reminds me that God goes before me, beside me and behind me in my life. He knows where he has taken me, and where he will take me. He may not deliver me from it, but He will always deliver me through it. Then He will use what I learned to help others in order to bring Him glory. THAT IS THE POWER OF THE HOLY SPIRIT IN ME 🙂
Jeremiah 1: 4-5 Reminds me that I am wonderfully made. That all that has transpired in my life was to mold me into a testimony to glorify God. He created me for His purpose and ALL will ALWAYS be well with Him.
It is humbling, amazing that the awesome God of the universe could love me so personally. Not only does the Lord tells us of the depths of His love but His calling as well. I was feeling insecure concerning an opportunity to go to Africa and once again He encourages me that in Him I can do all things
I am continually in awe of God and how He speaks to me. Earlier this morning in my devotion, I was struck by a comment…God is in the process of fitting us for a new world, and He will give us everything we need to make us ready. This painted a great word pic for me…excited that God is fitting me…mold, make, form, creating me…for a new world.
And then I read your devo and yes I am here with an expectant and curious heart, desiring to live out the purpose for which I was created!!! Thank You Gwen! I look forward to part two and your new book! AND I look forward to meeting you someday!
Leslie.
As for Jeremiah 1:4-5…before I was CREATED God knew me and before I was BORN He already had His plan for my life. Oh how I wonder how badly I have messed it up..but I know that He makes beauty from ashes and I am so thankful.
I am more because He loves me, he knew me before he formed and he still formed me. He knew my life and he still set me apart, amazing is my Lord. Awesome is his love and thank you for helping me to remember that his love is deeper than I can know.
We are nothing on our own; it is Christ in us that gives us value and purpose. We do Him more disservice than we do ourselves when we don’t live like He is in us. I had to come to that conclusion before I could be bold for Him; as an introvert, it’s really hard for me to stand under the spotlight. One thing that constantly reminds me of what I have is the song by Colton Dixon, “Limitless”.
I’ve read this verse before, Jeremiah 1:4-5, but the part that makes me feel so uneasy is “…I appointed you as a prophet to be nations.” The thought that God chose me to spread his word to help grow his nation scares me. I’ve known that I was chosen and never felt uneasy, ackward, or ashamed because I know what I’ve done and I also know who I’ve become. But within the past few months I feel like I’m growing in a direction that is unexplainably different and unknown. I’m grateful for what God has in store for me but I have to be honest in saying that the unknown places a bit more fear in me that I don’t like at all.
Praying God will give you the knowledge and assurance to step out in faith to be a beacon of light for others so they may know God’s unconditional love.
Who am I to doubt what God has created? He never makes a mistake. Yet there isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t doubt myself… He knew me when I was in the hidden place! He made me! I will rejoice in this and begin today to live like the creation of God that I am. I am a daughter of the King. I am made in His image, saved by His grace, to be alight unto the world around me. Who am I to doubt that! Go out and shine today!
It makes me feel like I’m ok the way I am. I get so caught up in what I’m not doing, the mistakes I make DAILY, and in my feeling of inferiority. This was a reminder that I needed today…I’m not perfect, but that is ok
I brings me to tears. Most days I don’t feel I’m of any real value…..whether it’s work family or myself…but when I read Jeremiah 1:4-5 I’m humbled to know He knew me BEFORE I was born. ….He Created and anointed me……I praise God and sing His glory…
I feel His deep Grace and Love and Protection after reading Jeremiah 1:4-5! I have been very hard on myself, doubting how I could use my talents and gifts to make an impact in this world as a health coach, a teacher and writer. I have been blessed with beauty, both inside and out, and sometimes I am so afraid to shine. I am afraid that people think I have it made, I have no issues or doubts, that I look too perfect to be real. Oh, my sister, if they only knew! If they only knew that I have had doubts and fears about myself, that I have wrestled with feelings of unworthiness, eating disorders, and bouts of deep sadness! I have hidden my joy and passion for fear it intimidates others to think–“How dare she be joyful, and use her gifts and talents, how dare she?”
Jeremiah 1:4-10 have come up so many times resently, I too have said so many of those negatives about myself. Why is it so much easier to think negatively than positively about ourselves when God sees us so differently. Thank you so much for your honesty .
I am about to step out on a new adventure with God and feel so inadequate and ill equipped for the task but I know it is not for me to be concerned about, He has me in the palm of His hand and will give me all that I need as I need it, trusting his plan for my life is tough but he has known me from the very start and has kept me safe through some of the worst situations, even before I knew Him sso my trust is in Him. He will not let me down!
I just smiled! And I thought, God- I sell myself so short and I apologize because that in a sense is downplaying Your handiwork in me. Father, please forgive me! I’m more than encouraged by this devotional. It let’s me know I need to start focusing on living the life God intended for me to live. So while I’m in my “layover” season, I’m expecting the GREAT, the UNIMAGINABLE, and ABUNDANT things to happen for my family and me! I have been beating myself up for many different things- career moves, healthy living issues, etc. But its too much! Nothing more than a distraction to derail me from what God has for me! So I embrace where I am and that what God has for me, it is for me! And cinsidering the season I’m currently in, it must be good!!! Jesus came that we might have life AND have it abundantly! That’s a promise! And God keeps His promises! THANK YOU JESUS!!
When I look at this verse it brings me to tears. I know in my heart that God knows me, he has known me before I was born, he created me and all He asks is that I be what He created me to be. But, I too, beat myself up over things and many of the words you wrote above I have said… all too often. I pray that these words reach all of us who feel broken by life, circumstances, words… I pray that God reaches down and touches our hearts and minds and we all move toward truly knowing that HE KNOWS US and HE LOVES US… and that is all that we need. Thank you for your heartfelt words… they touched me more than you will ever know.
Amen!
Hello Gwen this verse made me feel loved without measure and was exactly what i needed as i pick on myself on a daily basis even though i walk with Jesus daily the enemy pulls me to that point and sometimes im left with doubts but reading this today was God speaking to me , Thank you