Who Defines Your Worth?

Gwen SmithBeauty, Blog, Broken into Beautiful, Value, Worth 26 Comments

Years ago, I bought my daughter a really cute jacket at the mall. It was a hoodie made of a cuddly fabric with cream, lavender, and mint green horizontal stripes. The jacket zipped up in the front and was well crafted, stylish, and simply adorable.

When I bought it, I felt like the price on the tag was a fair one, so I gladly pulled out my wallet and paid the retail amount. I was a kid in a candy store on the way home – fully anticipating a shriek of happiness from my little bag-of-beans when I gave it to her.

I wasn’t disappointed. Kennedy loved her new coat, and I was pleased with my purchase. Happy dances all around… until a week later, when I saw the same jacket in the same store at a greatly reduced price.

Are you tensing up with me?

I felt schnookered! As soon as I saw the red line on the price tag of the unsold coats, everything changed in my mind – Kennedy’s jacket wasn’t worth what I paid for it.

When we speak of the worth of something, we often consider it to be a relative term. One that has shifting factors. For example, the jacket I bought was thirty-nine dollars, and a week later it was nineteen ninety-nine. The jacket didn’t change, but its’ perceived worth did.

Now, consider the worth of a woman.

Are the factors that determine her value based upon variable and shifting factors or are they based upon fixed factors?

Seems to be a silly question, doesn’t it?

Fixed, of course!

But, if the answer is so glaringly obvious, why do we struggle so much as women with feelings of worthlessness? Why do we walk around feeling like that red lined jacket? I think it’s because we often allow variable earthly factors to define our worth.

There are so many reasons why women feel worthless:

Because they’ve been abused (raped, molested, physically abused, verbally abused…)

Because they’ve been told that they’re worthless (by a parent, spouse, sibling, teenage child, or another…)

Because of choices they’ve made or that have been made for them (divorce, infidelity, abortion, promiscuity, eating disorders, addictions, uncontrolled anger…)

Because they’ve been cheated on (infidelity, internet affair, pornography…)

Because they’re co-dependent (conclude their value based upon other people – “If my husband isn’t okay, I’m not okay.”)

Because they don’t collect a paycheck (stay at home moms that have left the work force, laid off employees, displaced employees, those on disability…)

Because they’ve battled an illness (unable to care for family, perform basic home duties, participate in ministry or Bible study like they once did, can’t drive, cook…)

Unfortunately, the variable factors that we use to define our worth are endless. Many of us feel worthless. Why? We’ve felt ignored, invisible, insignificant, useless, undesired, ugly, unloved, or forgotten.

We girls are emotional; broken in many ways. Great portions of our identity and of our personal value are wrapped into combustible packages of emotion – how we feel about this or that. The truth is, our worth has nothing to do with our feelings.

Trust me, I’m not going to try to convince you that I know everything there is to know about feeling like a woman of worth or about being a woman of worth. In fact, the more I know God, the less inclined I am to pretend to have life or faith figured out. I’m constantly tempted to define my worth with activities, emotions, and accomplishments.

I’ve come to realize, however, that way of thinking is a spiritual dead-end road.

Scripture tells us that anything we do in our own strength or of our own goodness is of no value to God. “All of us have become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags” (Isaiah 64:6a).

What I DO know is this: because of Jesus, I’m a woman of highest worth. Not because of anything else.

We are God’s daughters, made in His image, precious in His sight.

In light of this, we need to set aside feelings that diminish our value and embrace our proper identity: Child of the King of Kings.

Hear this, friend: feelings of worthlessness are from Satan himself. It burns me up that the enemy has such a strong grip on God’s daughters in this area. We need to associate the word worthless with the word lie. {Tweet this!} That’s exactly what it is, a big, fat lie!

God wants every one of us to experience hope and healing in Christ and have an appropriate sense of self-worth.

So let’s go back to Kennedy’s new coat for just a moment. Imagine walking into God’s department store. There on the rack, you spy a coat that is just plain fabulous – I mean stop-you-in-your-tracks fabulous! One-size fits all, the tag reads.

Yeah, right, you whisper under your breath.

Then you flip over the price tag and it’s crazy expensive – way beyond what you could ever dream of paying. Like, if you added up every dollar that ever passed through your hands – then multiplied that by ten thousand – that kind of expensive. Then imagine the storeowner walking over to you, slipping the coat off the rack and onto your shoulders.

“It’s a perfect fit,” He smiles.

“Sir,” you manage with a whisper, “I could never afford such a coat. This is meant for royalty and I’m, well, just an ordinary girl.”

“Oh precious woman, this coat is made especially for you, and the price has already been paid in full.”

As the owner straightens the sleeves on your arms and adjusts the collar around your neck, you notice his hands – nail pierced hands. And suddenly you realize that this is the covering you were meant to wear all along.

You are precious and highly valuable in the eyes of the One who sees. And you never, never, never have to worry about being on anyone’s bargain rack again.

 

Holy Father,
I’m humbled to be viewed as precious in Your eyes. Thank You for taking on my sin so that I could take on your righteousness. Please help me to see myself as You see me. Help me to thrive in Your beauty as a woman of worth!
In Jesus’ Name, amen.

 

FOR YOUR REFLECTION and RESPONSE

What came to your mind as you read today’s devotion? Are you held captive by feelings of worthlessness? Spend a few moments in prayer and ask God to reveal truth to your heart about how He sees you.

Let’s gather in community. Post a prayer of response on the wall of my blog.

Have a beautiful, grace-filled day,

GWEN

 

PS. Have you taken the FREE 5-Day Psalm Challenge yet?

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HERE ARE A FEW GRACEOLOGIE PODCAST EPISODES
RELATED TO THE THEME OF TODAY’S POST

Life is full of labels that lie to us and try to limit us. Don’t you think it’s time to stop being identified by the circumstances you’ve come from or the names others have called you? Esther Fleece Allen joins me for episode to talk about your God-given identity.

Esther Fleece Allen on the GRACEOLOGIE with Gwen Smith Podcast

Lisa Bevere joins me to discuss what the Bible has to say about living a strong, powerful and passionate life.

Many women struggle with feeling weighed down by fear and insecurity while longing to rise up into their calling and purpose. Real-life issues press down, discourage and derail us from leading and serving in areas God calls us to. Jo Saxton joins me for a great conversation about owning your voice, gathering your community and stepping into your influence!


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Comments 26

  1. This really touched me. I am on disability. It is never mentioned in any other devotional that i read, but because i do not work i often feel worthless and sometimes even lazy. Many people in the US view people on disability this way…especially because i am on it for depression. Thank you for mentioning this issue that so many women face…being disabled.

  2. DEAR GWEN,
    THANK YOU FOR BEING A BLESSING TO MY LIFE, GOD BLESS YOU.
    PLEASE PRAY FOR ME AM STRUGGLING TO DEAL WITH ANGER.

  3. I am indeed humbled by His love for me. Thank you for reminding me that i am precious in His sight and that i am covered under His blood. Thank You Father for loving me.

  4. As I wrestled tonight with some of my own worthlessness (you hit them all!} I wanted to leave with a prayer. Thank you Lord for Gwen who you’ve given who is writing truth. She is guiding us women to look to You and Your perfect love for each of us. Lord You know my every struggle. Keep my eyes focused on You. Thank you for sending this message to me right now. How I praise You. InJesus’ Name, Amen
    Thank you again for writing Biblically on such a relevant topic for so many Christian women….and in a personal note, for speaking to my heart.

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      You seriously brought me to tears, girl. Thanks SO much for taking time to encourage ME for encouraging YOU! The Lord knew I needed this word today. Grateful.

      GWEN

  5. I need His word written on my heart
    Romans 8:1
    Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus

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    1. I need His word written on my heart
      Romans 8:1
      Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus

  6. Thank you Gwen for sharing this. Lord help me to remember the finished work on Calvary. Dear God help me to remember always that you don’t see me as sinful anymore because I am wrapped in Jesus. You see Jesus in his resssurected glory. I pray that by your Holy Spirit, you will remind me to always worship you from a place of worth.

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      YES, Manare! You are beautiful in His sight because of the grace of Jesus! Thanks for sharing your heart, friend.

      GWEN

  7. This is wonderful encouraging for a woman to know how God looks at us through loving & caring eyes . How we are worth so much more than anyone gives us credit for. … . . Thank you so much for sharing this and spreading words of love. Such a blessing.. God bless you.

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      Love that the LORD used today’s post to encourage so many in the truth of His love for us!! Thanks for joining the conversation, Shirley!!

      GWEN

  8. I’m sooo Thankful For your heart Gwen, You always Post Blogs that Touch me so deeply. I’ve been in tears all morning asking God to show me My worth in His eyes because lately I feel so lost and So Worthless, I feel Unwanted, Not needed. When I Saw the email for today’s blog, I was sure that God Knows my thoughts and I know he Made sure I saw it. Just reading this today has Given me new perspective on Who I am. I am Child of the King of Kings. , I’m Daughter of the Royal King. Some days are worse than others and today I can’t express how much I needed this….Thank you so much.

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      Oh, Belinda! I’m sooo glad the Lord used this post to encourage you in truth today, friend! YES! You surely are valuable!!! Love doing life with you!

      GWEN

  9. Hello Gwen and ladies, when I read today’s message it resonated with me so deeply. When you are doing all you can and still being told you are not doing enough it makes you take a look who you are. I can say that reading today’s message reminds me that I am fearfully and wonderfully made by an Amazing God who cherishes me and my flaws so much that He sent His Son to die for me and when I think about how wonderful God is for doing that for me I know I am worthy of the finest value. Thank you for reminding me that my value is in what God did and continues daily to do for me not in what others think that make me valuable because their calculations are on what I do and not who I am. Who I am is the daughter of a good good Father.

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      SO glad you connected with the message of my post today. YES! Your value is secure because of Jesus. Loved hearing your heart!

      GWEN

  10. THANK YOU FOR YOUR MINISTRY TO WOMEN. THIS POST WAS JUST WHAT I SO DESPERATELY NEEDED. SAT QUIETLY AND PRAYERFULLY IN THE PRESENCE OF KINDNESS, LOVE AND PEACE. MY HEART AND MIND NEEDED THIS. GOD BLESS.

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  11. Thank God for this message Gwen. I am no longer on the bargain rack. I am worth so much more. No more bargain racks!!

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  12. I have no words. Just tears of gratitude for you and your ministry and these words we all so desperately need!! Thank you.

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  13. He sings over us! We are with you Gwen and all that we are women of worth in His Holy sight. The enemy is a liar and has stolen too much from us and from men. We are made in God’s image and Jesus Christ is that perfect image through which everything is made. Let’s keep looking to Him as the perfector and finisher of our faith and stay in His precious Word, prayer and worship. We do have enemies and let us put on the full armor of God and fight the good fight in the special way He gives each of us even as bad people may try to corrupt it. With you all in it! Your friend,

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